Survivor: Heroes vs Villains -- What we think will happen -- Episode 1

ACME will be posting our picks for the Survivor boot each week. Be advised that this weekly post can, and probably will, contain spoilers, so with that knowledge in hand, forge ahead if you wish. As the old saying goes: "Don't go if you don't want to know"

Our picks will probably be in line with pretty much every other "spoiler" board out there, since this season has been pretty thoroughly spoiled and vetted. Every now and then, we may take our own slant on things, and will always attempt to present our opinions in as humorous and entertaining a manner as possible.

So... if you haven't already wandered off because:
A. You don't want the show spoiled and you really don't want to know
B. You've already seen the picks from other boards and were hoping to see something different here
C. I've bored you senseless and your ADHD has sent you on a random journey across the internets
Here's ACME's prediction for what happens on Survivor this week
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With a 2-hour premiere, there will be, unlike nearly all previous premiere episodes, a Reward challenge. It will take place right after the "Apocalypse Now" opening sequence. It will be fierce and physical, resulting in injuries (reportedly a broken toe and a separated shoulder) and lots of blurred body parts due to nudity (I'm waiting for the "Director's Cut" uncensored DVD myself...).
We believe the Heroes tribe will be victorious here, at least partially due to the naked nymphet.

The two hours will not only allow for the inclusion of a Reward Challenge, but will also provide time for "filler"... introducing us to the cast of characters, all of whom we've already seen in previous seasons, some now for the third time! (Why the hell don't they do this for the regular seasons when we're trying to get to know 16 to 20 complete unknowns? Mark Burnett... if you got my memo, please make this a regular feature of the season opener!). We will also be treated to more scenes of Russell's obcessive quest for hidden immunity idols. Will he find one? (I dunno...) Will the veteran players be as casual and clueless about his furtive searching? (I doubt it...)

Immunity will be another multi-stage challenge involving (stunner!) puzzles, and we believe that this time, the Villains (MuHAHAHAHAHA!) will take the ugly immunity idol back to camp.

As for the boot, that will, of course, come from the ranks of the "Heroes". They will have a number of plausible options to consider with a couple of weaklings and two injured players to pick from, but we believe that their choice will be...

... but first some entertainment!



... so there you have it!